Pain is just pain. Despair is only a shadow, an illusion. I don't own a firearm, simply because it would too-easily end both. Not going to go that route. It's cowardice to the nth degree. I always admired the writing of Hunter S. Thompson, but he took that way out. It was foreshadowed in his first book, near the end. I almost took that path years ago, but it's just too selfish. Glad I failed. Some days you just have to man-up and push through. I owe too much. I owe everyone who ever loved me and believed in me. I can't slap God in the face and toss back His gift. I can't. I won't. Anyone who ever thought they were useless, worthless.... you're wrong. Plain and simple. You keep on, keep fighting, keep struggling. It's worth it. The world won't be a better place without you. It's far better with you, no matter how imperfect you may think you are. Trust me on this one, I've been to the edge. You are the only you we've got. That's pretty cool. We need to keep us. All of us crazy, oddball types need to stick together. The world would be pretty damn boring if we quit. :) Now...peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches and badminton! :D